where did all the music go?

Over the years, I’ve accumulated quite a bit of music, first on vinyl then CDs. In my early teens it was mainly Glam, especially T Rex and Bowie, late teens, it was Gong (with their pot-head pixies) and Steve Hillage (blush), dub, then a bit of punk, Poison Girls and Twotone, Ska, 80s electro, Human League, Cabaret Voltaire, Bowie (again), Psychic TV, old R&B, soul, Marc Almond, latin, lounge and the odd bit of Britpop & Amy W. I especially liked dancing to it all, even including Latin & Ballroom at lesbian & gay tea dances. I also listened at home, though I’ve never been able to handle background music whilst I’ve been focussing on something else.

But now, I never listen to it.

Why? I guess like most people music is associated with moments in my life but as too many of those times have painful associations, as I moved on, I sealed them off so that to listen to them now brings up the hopes I had then and the disappointments that followed. They were connected so much to the social side of my life that, with bad health and disenchantment, I’ve lost touch with. The problem with shutting off Plan A when you move onto Plan B, is that, eventually, you run out of alphabet, run out of words and run out of music.